To start with,
I am getting no time at all
Right after coming back to Hyderabad, there was a flurry of things pending in my plate. I tried my best to keep my mind away from some solitude here, may be I require it after all.
I stayed in my house, locked it like a secure container, to house my feelings for two whole days, lived like Howard Hughes in The Aviator or should I say in his real life. The genius inside him had an excessive obsession for cleanliness, hygiene, he could not bear anything out of the normal.
I was but stung by a mood quite opposite to that,
first and foremost, after a gap of three months when you enter a room like mine in the ground floor of a building, without a regular cleaner, all you get is a bachelors den that even the strongest of them would think at least thrice before stepping in.
I was sitting inside, thinking about the due course of the next few weeks to come. I am not sure, what makes a man motivated for larger goals, even after giving his 100% the returns don’t come. Still, unfazed by the uncertainty of the coming times, I slept , I slept throughout the weekend,
The only problem in between was, that my sister called me up to see the scores on the 6th match morning.
Well, that was a sight, that reminds of the misery and pain of those school days, we loved cricket, I was born in the year 1983, the year india won the world cup, and may be, it will remain empty handed, thoughout, one man army, one match wonders, one series in decades,
fancying a win in the foreign grounds, I remembered the good old school days, taking a leave ,, skipping school, not even to meet my sweet heart of yesteryears, we were more often than not, pushed in a misery, pushed into that gory hole of hopeless ness,
but we survived, and again in the next match , we came back to life, we started with the same enthusiasm.
Gradually, amongst my friends, I saw that the cricket pitch had settled down, many of my friends were taken to watching F1, NBA, or something else,
they were merely getting an a inherent aversion , that grew over a period of time , slowly subsiding the fever , and later on it became second skin to not watch any of Indias matches
and even if possible, only the last 5 overs of Indias batting, Slowly came the IPL and now I don’t have any regional,zonal or country level patriotism left in me. All I know is that there is s good cricket with some evening popcorn.Just enjoy it,
May be that explains why I returned back to cricket or returned back to watching some of it. But then till March 2009, India was running at a success rate past 70 % in the One dayers, a fact that was shown to me, and I quickly regained some enthusiasm, watched some of the matches, till things started getting back to the 90s again.
There is a dialogue in the movie Swadesh, that liked very much, it goes something like this “Don’t show us dreams Babuji, this was not meant for us”
All I am pointing here is not hopelessness coming out of inherent weakness, but there lies some other signs that one has to catch, during the world cup this time India, lost the first match , but had a more than fair chance of winning the next two to make it to the semis, but there was a wash out in the match against the Aussies, and then there was a almost match winner from Pakistan that Aussies won,
India could have come back , and that did not work out.
Well, this time, I am not unhappy with the team, I think we batted well ,sometimes fielded well too, and bowling was not like the 90s when Venkatesh Prasad ( who still asks Ishant to slow down,gaping hole in his mouth , should shut down , as a measure of national security , you will know what I am talking about if you follow the newspapers, )
we were doing pretty much fine in the series. IN the 5 th match,though we lost it, none of the batsman , till the last one, did not give up, all of them had a partnership starting, all of them put up a fight,
All I am hinting, is in your own grounds, especially Indians are tigers, and we were like tigers, but coming close to s victory , coming close to it, we somehow lost it, that is just the summary of the whole thing,
we as a nation, are always there, we have the best, we have the best talent, we have the best weather, so much fertile land, and human fertility, boy there is a census that more than proves . All I can say is, that, somewhere is there a genuine, factor, that keeps up behind, is there some thing that was not made to be so ,
I have no complains against the team, may be Tendulkar should step down, may be, Sehwag should be given an incentive for staying back, may be Ishant should be isolated from Venkatesh Prasad. but with these weaknesses, too, we are a good team, and 4-2 is not a number that I will gulp down.
All I can say is, that, if it were not meant for you, it will simply not happen, you may push a mountains, squeeze water out of its rocks, drown in a bottle full of water, but if a simple thing like a wrong Umpires decision is supposed to be against, you simply cannot reverse it, You cannot change the course of time, you cannot change the luck with which you were born.
May be some call it destiny , but I think we need to put it in more words, we need to see beyond, hope, beyond, something will happen.
Most of my friends, think, see, we have so many geniouses, we have so many good Indian Students, Arrey change in India is right around the corners, I seriously doubt it, the forefathers thought for entire generations and they are now dead, taking with them hopes of good times, they just came hopeless, died hopeless.